They Say (After KiNG & Simply Kat)

They say  I bellyflopped out of a commitment-phones’ nightmare

I say  I'm still the girl of your dreams

They call me clingy,
        too sensitive,

     say my feet wear clumsy more than shoes

     plummet into blackhole hearts

I say  God attached my organs so 
     I could give you the whole galaxy inside me

They say  you’re too put together 

     try too hard to be something

I say  I'm tired of being called nothing 

     you haven’t been checking the voicemails from my anxiety

     Don't know that when my heartbeat is a dialtone

     a clean shirt means another morning

They say  the alarm is my only call out of bed each morning

I say  someone has to radio activate the sun

They say  I'm a sunny side up egg spilling out its yolk 

     Tell me to tuck my dick in  
     I don't have enough cock to be this cocky

I say  I've never had enough self-control to suffocate my tongue

They say  staple your mouth
     conceal your atria

     stop putting your private shit out there

I say  I can’t let it live in here

     my body won’t be another cage

They say  Someone will love you in spite of your body

     Say I’m thick

     curvy

     1-800 hotline bling fat

I say  I am hard to cut through

     ripple like radiowaves 

     that Drake is my kind of nice Jewish boy

They say  Brown boys like a little extra

     you’re something they could grab onto

They say it like an insult

I say I’m not defined by who wants to fuck me

     And maybe I don’t want white boys to fuck me

     Because we’ve been fucked over by them for way too long

     that snowmen melt into fishbowl hammerheads

     smash mothers into dinner      
     father tastes like a kitchen knife chasing me into memory

They say  if I want a guy to stay, 

     I should stop bringing up my daddy issues

I say  I’m looking for a man

They say  no man wants a girl with a voice

I say  every girl has a voice

They say  but yours is too loud

I say  silence is what you feed a genocide

They make a Holocaust joke

I don’t let them dig up the family graveyard

They say  You make everything about being Jewish

I say  too many people have died for me to be here

     Too many people have died for all of us to be here

     we are ricocheted bullets 

     out of ashes

     I write above a graveyard, guilty I’m not buried beneath

They say  I’m dying to be noticed

Call me obnoxious

the attention whore

the drama queen

the flaming cunt

I say  you shouldn’t have fed me matches

     If you were afraid of fire

Call me slut

call me prude

call me fucked up

I say  It really fucked you that up that I wouldn’t fuck you?

They say  fuck you

I say  I have beheaded ghosts you’ll never have to see

They say  we don’t see you

I say  listen

They say no

I say  listen

They say no

I say  I am an earthquake’s footprint stabbing a tsunami

     autotune my hiccups to hurricanes

     Paper clip my voicebox, 

     but I will never be your silent statistic

=They say  I’m always tossing in dead babies

I say  you’re just mad my anchors still cry

They ask  why are you crying?

I say  because I’m brave enough to still feel

They ask  How do you feel?

I say  my toes tremble on six inch heels of empowerment

     I’m always walking on eggshells

They say  They’re just eggshells

I say  we are ruptured nests

     we are pulsed from the cracks

     the rippled sum of broken sea

     we should be closer to our salty bloodlines

     but I can’t figure out how to swim

They ask  That why you dance like you are drowning?

I answer  difficult women never breathe easy

They ask  Why do you think everyone hates you?

     They wouldn’t if I knew the answer.

They say  ask a therapist

I say  I have an appointment with a empty page

They say  shed ink until you're naked starlight

I say  my veins are only glowsticks

They say you can swallow this darkness

I try to believe them

I try to believe myself

I try to believe in myself

I try to believe

They say  You have such a big personality

I say  I never dreamt of being this small.