AV Club

If you asked me what I wanted to become

When I was ten

I’d say Ali

Because when you were Ali

Things just went the right way

No matter what you’d say

It’d come out beautiful

Serene

Until some bizarre scene

At age seventeen

When she was telling me about her campers

Oh, I had the weird bunk

And I was like completely happy about it

Because deep down I’m a dork,

But they were so surprised I knew the Harry Potter musical

And I was talking about it to my unit head

Who is from the same town as some of them

And thing is that although they’re a lot of fun at camp

They have no clue how to act in the real world

While the other girls are hooking up with the guys

They just want a guy to ask them to banquet

And hold their hand

I hold back that I was in that bunk

That I still want those things

That I’m about to go into college

And just like those 13 year olds

I'm ok just being kissed

I resist the wish

To tell her that I got into my top choice

Been told a world without my love is doom

Performed for a room 
I don't boast

That I've had an article on the Huffington post

While only ever undressing myself with words

Because we live in a world

Where we are taught

Not only to hate our bodies

But what we do with them

You don’t want to be a nerd

But just the right amount of slut

That sex is the only cool way to be touched

And if we go too far we are rushed

Into titles

Acceptable by not us but celebrity idols

If you have a scarlet A or V

You’re a member of the AV club

I’ve read so many whore confessionals

But never a poem about the sin

Of the lip virgin

Because we’re engaged in something too shameful

Good is the new bad

And there’s nothing as sad

As the celibate old hag

Because unlike tricks

We can’t bitch

About our issues with our dad

And we have abuses of excuses

Of girls who treat their bodies as his

But my best friend

Must extend a lie

When she looks you in the eye

And “confesses” how far she’s bin

Because apparently a body can’t be a temple

If it’s let no one in

And the thread of civilization is wearing thin

When both "whore" and "virgin"

Are an insult

But I just sit there

Unable to revolt

When perfect Ali tells me

That anyone who hasn’t fit into the complex of sex

Can’t survive in society

I just want to bolt

Because it’s clear that loving yourself isn’t enough

And all this bullshit stuff

Like you suck if you don’t suck

But if you suck too much then you’re a slut

And innocence is just an unlucky rut

I don’t kick her butt

And say what makes me hot

Is the spot

Where my soul goes on fire

And that all women are created are equal

Whether they love for words or hire

Just because sex sells

Doesn’t mean I have to be a buyer

And I’ll still respect you

If you’ll respect the fact I'm not a what
I'm a who

Because I’m no late bloomer

I’m a tree

And when spring comes
It’ll be right on time for me

Because I’m not going to reflect

A society that won’t accept

Girls who go to the streets so they can eat

But those who give everything out for free

Because there is nothing sexier

That watching “Sex In the City” on DVD

But I sit silent

Afraid to speak

Transformed into meek

By the threat I’ll be a freak

Because brides still wear white

But chastity is no longer chic

And I feel my voice trying to peek

Through my fears and ribs

As I replace my personal taste

With nods and fibs

And I just think what a waste

Of a perfect face

Sewed onto a soul of misconceptions

And wrong directions

Who thinks she’s a ten
Because she’s given that many erections

Caught in the reflection

Of who we can and can’t be

Thinking that feminism and liberty

Is another reason to get on your knees

Because Alice Paul and Susan B. Anthony

Fought for us to do what we please

Not to please

That we have the choice of being a prude or tease

If we want to fly like the birds

Before we get busy like the bees

And the girl who I wished I could be

Who’s got popularity and admission into Ivies

Thinks anyone taking their time has a disease

And it’s not just STDs that have us infected

Because we’re living life unprotected

A mix of the 50s and 70s

Women are trying to breathe out progress

But all we exhale is a wheeze

And beam at the scheme

That says you have to be gay

To play for your own team

And that it’s ok to say

Ariel, hey,

It’ll happen for you some day

Like standing on my own feet I’m incomplete

For we’re not just searching for seats in congress

But the room that can possess

The right to address our own destiny

Where we can be who and with who we want to be

Not the land of free love

But self love

And now I’m don’t want to be Ali,

Even though she’s a bright dove

But the girl who’s ok to say

All of the above.